Jebediah Kerman stands in front of the newly opened Kerbal Space Centre. |
Jebediah Kerman, eccentric billionaire has today announced his intention to solve the housing crisis, by launching Kerbs into space! While underground is becoming massively overcrowded, the surface of our planet is by contrast uninhabited due to the harsh conditions. Anybody setting foot on the surface has to wear an environmental suit or risk being fried alive by the intense radiation from our sun.
In an exclusive interview with The Kerbol, Mr Jebediah said: "We are rapidly running out of room underground, we can't live on the surface, so what is the alternative? I propose we establish colonies on other worlds, surely we must be able to find something suited to our needs? However, first we need to find out what is out there. Too long have Kerbs stared downwards. It's time to look to the skies!"
Mr Jebediahs job will not be an easy one, due to the harsh conditions, very little is known known about the surface of our world, and many critics claim that travelling through the atmosphere, or "flying" as it's known, is impossible, let alone getting into space.
"Of course it's going to be difficult, and yes we face alot of unknowns, but this is why I am pleased to announce that my good friend Bill Kerman will be joining KSC as the head of Research and Development, and Bob Kerman has agreed to join as Head of Engineering, but it's not just about the big bosses. We need volunteers, Kerbs who aren't afraid of the unknown. Kerbs who want to see the universe, or at least our little corner of it, and most of all, Kerbs who want to save the world!"
Strong words indeed... whether or not KSC is a success waits to be seen, but it is at least a novel approach to the problems that plague our world.