KWFRS cuts ties with KSC

In a surpise move, the Kerbin World First Record Society has today announced it will no longer be funding the Kerbal Space Centre.

In a statement a spokesman said, "While we recognise the work that KSC are doing as being integral to our survival, we are a KERBIN record society. We do not feel the direction that KSC are heading in matches our objectives."

This comes after KSC announced today that they have succesfully proven their "if you fly fast enough you won't fall down" theory. Further analysis showed that if speed was increased, it was possible to get further away from the planet, and if decreased you would get lower.

"We believe we can use this information to get us to Mun" Jebediah Kerman told the Kerbol. "In fact, I am please to announce a new partnership with Kerlington  Model Rockets and Paper Products Inc, who have agreed to fund a mission to explore Mun."

Exclusive! Kerbin is round!

KSC are at it again! The agencies second craft "Kerbin 2" has broken the surly bonds of gravity and reached space! Well sort of.. Jebediah Kerman explains.

"I think the most surprising thing was that our planet is round! We've always worked on the assumption that our planet is a kind of disk, and the atmosphere was pushing us down, which is why we fell back to Kerbin"

"What we actually found though, was that even though our instruments were confirming that there was no atmosphere, we still fell back to Kerbin. This must mean that Kerbin itself is pulling on us.

We caught up with head of R&D at KSC, Bill Kerman who elaborated. "This changes our understanding of the universe. What if it's not possible to escape the pull of our planet? Can we ever stay in space? I think so. I believe, if we manage to go fast enough, we can actually stay up there, or "orbit" Kerbin. Essentially we'd be falling constantly, but moving so fast it's impossible to hit the ground. The problem is, we found that when the pod re-entered the atmosphere, the air started to heat it. Luckily the effects were minor but the faster we go, the bigger I'd expect this to be."

 It might sound crazy, but financial backer KWFRS don't seem to think so. "We've extended funding to KSC today to allow them to explore this new theory. We need to stay in space, or we're all doomed. If we can't escape then there is no hope for our species.

So what of the Kerbin 2? What made this particular craft so successful in escaping the atmosphere? We caught up with Bob Kerman, who explained.

"The problem with solid fuel, is when you light it, you can't control it, you just point and go. So we developed this new type of engine, which runs on liquid fuel. The big advantage is that we can shut down the engines if something goes wrong, not to mention it's much more fuel efficient."

Any disadvantages?

"Well, it is heavier, but the extra efficiency counteracts that. The plan with Kerbal 2 was to use the solid fuel to get through the thickest parts of the atmosphere, then use the liquid engines to push into space, and it worked!"

What of Bill's "moving fast enough we miss the planet" plan?

"Personally I think Bill is crazy, but I think we can make a craft that moves fast enough. I can't give anything away but I've got a few things that came out of the lab up my sleeve."

Interesting... we'll have to see what the illustrious boys at KSC will do next. One thing is for sure, those who doubted them, must surely now be doubting themselves.

The Kerbal 2 used an experimental new "liquid fuel" engine as well as traditional solid fuel

With the solid fuel expended it's time to fire up the new engine

It seems to be a success!

KSC scientists were surprised to discover that Kerbin is round

A potential danger? KSC detected massive heat spikes as the craft re-entered the atmosphere

Thanks to a new technology, the command pod seperated before landing and was parachuted to safety

First Flight takes off from KSC

They promised us something big, and they weren't wrong!

The fledgling Kerbal Space Centre have taken their first step towards the stars. In a surprise move boss Jebediah Kerman personally took charge of the first flight.

"We call it a solid rocket booster" explained Bob Kerman, head of Engineering. "Basically, we pack the engine full of explosives, then we light it. It might be dangerous, but Bob knows his stuff."

Indeed he does, the inaugural flight resulted in setting a new altitude record of 13,000m, well beyond financial backer KWFRS's meager 5,000 target. "We are delighted" said a spokesman for the company. "Not only have KSC proven that getting off the ground is possible, they have smashed our wildest dreams. We are so pleased we have agreed to fund a new project, to see if we can reach space itself!

What of those who claimed that no Kerbal would ever survive a flight? Well the eggheads at KSC  have an answer for that. "Our boys have invented this thing, called a parachute. Basically... you get a giant sheet, attach it to the command pod, and that slows you down." Sounds like witchcraft, but amazingly it worked! The craft was safely returned to Kerbin, although the engine sadly did not survive the landing.

With  the basic concept being proven, rumours have reached the Kerbols ears of companies approaching KSC for a chance to get their inventions tested. KSC refused to comment on these rumours.

The Kerbal One sits on the launchpad.

Blast-off! As the engine ignites Kerbals take their first step towards the sky

With the fuel depleted the craft begins to free-fall

Safe at last! The capsule containing Jebediah safely returns to the ground.

Record-Keeping Soceity backs KSC

In a surprising move, the Kerbal World-Firsts Record-Keeping Society (KWFRS) has approached eccentric billionaire Jebediah Kerman to fund his efforts to launch Kerbs into space.

A spokesman for the company said "KWFRS have always been at the forefront of science and this move proves that. We are excited to see what happens when ingenuity meets demand. I predict great things for the Kerbal Space Centre.

Jebediah Kerman was unavailable for comment, as rumours suggest he is going to pilot the first test craft. When questioned about this KSC simply said "Mr Jebediah is very involved in the company. He personally oversees every test, come back in a few days and we might have a little surpise for you".

Kerbal Space Centre opens for business.

Jebediah Kerman stands in front of the newly opened Kerbal Space Centre.

By Snodfast Kerman

Jebediah Kerman, eccentric billionaire has today announced his intention to solve the housing crisis, by launching Kerbs into space! While underground is becoming massively overcrowded, the surface of our planet is by contrast uninhabited due to the harsh conditions. Anybody setting foot on the surface has to wear an environmental suit or risk being fried alive by the intense radiation from our sun.

In an exclusive interview with The Kerbol, Mr Jebediah said: "We are rapidly running out of room underground, we can't live on the surface, so what is the alternative? I propose we establish colonies on other worlds, surely we must be able to find something suited to our needs? However, first we need to find out what is out there. Too long have Kerbs stared downwards. It's time to look to the skies!"

Mr Jebediahs job will not be an easy one, due to the harsh conditions, very little is known known about the surface of our world, and many critics claim that travelling through the atmosphere, or "flying" as it's known, is impossible, let alone getting into space.

"Of course it's going to be difficult, and yes we face alot of unknowns, but this is why I am pleased to announce that my good friend Bill Kerman will be joining KSC as the head of Research and Development, and Bob Kerman has agreed to join as Head of Engineering, but it's not just about the big bosses. We need volunteers, Kerbs who aren't afraid of the unknown. Kerbs who want to see the universe, or at least our little corner of it, and most of all, Kerbs who want to save the world!"

Strong words indeed... whether or not KSC is a success waits to be seen, but it is at least a novel approach to the problems that plague our world.